New starts are always scary right? The fear of the unknown and all that.
I have recently moved out with mini man. We are in our own house now and it's coming along nicely.
I've been able to get away from some pretty awful demons by moving out. Things that have haunted me for a long time, now are just faded bits of my memory that i have stuck in the "Do not open" box inside my head.
It does however make you realise that living with someone for such a long time does affect you. You sometimes turn to ask them something or laugh at something on the TV and expect them to be there laughing with you, which of course they aren't.
Living alone isn't lonely per se. It's just very new and very strange. I do wonder how i will cope. I mean in fairness I've always been quite a weak person who has relied on others emotionally and mentally. Now I'm going it alone and with a mini man to boot.
Dragging my baggage along may well be a long and tedious journey but others have done it and survived so I'm pretty sure i can right?
I have found that certain people i thought i knew, i don't know at all. But to be honest, that is their lookout. I'm not going to cry over it. It all comes out in the wash at the end of the day.
So for now, I'm keeping what's left of me tied and packaged and put in a bullet proof box that only I have the key for. No more damage. No more pain and no more making mistakes.
Love you all.
Princess x
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